Quentin the [MULE]

[Beaver]

How I learned to tell the truth. Say what you know to be true and walk away. If there is truth in it the one who picks it up and sees it is so, will find the same truth in it.

I met Quentin 28 years ago he was my girl friends Uncle. I had a brand new f-150 four wheel drive pickup. I told him it had a creeper gear and it would climb mountains. It was all that. Her Uncle told me he had a VW bug that was much better than my truck. He told me it would run circles around that F-150 four wheel drive. And he left it at that. He invited me and his niece to take that old VW for a ride in the field, on their farm, and he stood back, and allowed me to see for myself if it was true.

After a joy ride over hill and dale, it was plain to see, what he knew about that VW was exactly what he said it was. He spoke what he knew was the truth, and left me to find for myself if it was true.

Quentin was a quiet soul. He hardly spoke up, if at all. I was seventeen and dating his niece and I am not sure he was to happy about that. I was at the top of my game. He saw me as a potential problem. To me he seemed down trodden. He seemed as if he carried a burden, and I had yet to learn his past. When I did learn of the things he had been through, I do not know if I ever comprehended the burden he thought he had to carry. At one time in his life he was at the top of his game, and all things where good. and then the storms came. The same storms that come on us all, that leave us with a burden to carry, if we do not know where to place it. He had been raised in a time when Hell, Fire, and Brimstone was preached So you would run to God because you were afraid of the devil. To him Jesus was not one you could go to. He had been taught, every one gets what God gives them and you should never question what God did. Never ask Him why? Just carry your load, and remember God will never place on you more than you can carry. Someone had forgotten to tell him of a truth, that the devil had every intention of braking him down, especially if he thought God was the one doing it. Quentin believed not only was he suppose to carry his burden, but all His friends and family members too. When he heard of a burden some one else was carrying that burden also became his. He had not only lived through the death of his brother from suicide, a suicide attempt by his sister, but soon to follow, the death of his mother, another brother, and father. For a man that believed he could not ask God, Why? He had a burden that would bring any man to his knees, even the strongest, and he believed there was no place to put it down. He found peace in alcohol, it eased the pain of the load, he felt, was his alone. The world told him alcohol was a disease, and he should get help. He knew it was the only thing that helped. What every one else told him was the truth. He knew it was not! He was a man that would only speak of what he knew to be true, and leave you to agree, he would not argue. He knew, the Truth did not need to compete. It is, what it is. What he did not know, was this world was not going to be as generous with the truth as he was. This world would rather lie, and see you killed and destroyed, before it ever let you know the Truth. Not a good place for an honest man.

I married Quentin’s niece, and in the last 28 years I kept company with him 6 or 7 times. I came to know who he was in the last three years, and then he came to my house.

The storms in life that reach us all, came to our house. But the effect that they had on us were different, only because we knew where to lay our burdens down. They caused the same amount of pain, and it was that pain that allowed me to understand and know Quentin in a way I had never done before. I remember thinking, “my God, how could I go on with this if it was not for your Son giving me understanding and a place to lay this down?” And then I realized, Quentin had. He carried a pain, and alcohol was his escape. He was not a drunkard. He had yet to find the Truth he was searching for.

Two years ago I started this ministry on line. I knew I had been lead by the Holy Spirit to do so. I knew it was to reach people with the Truth. To present It for free, without arguement, and if the people that desired to know the same Truth, would pick it up, find the same Truth I had, and gain the peace that came with It.

The Spirit had told me I would be in contact with Quentin soon, but I was not to call him, he would call me. I don’t know if you have ever said, “are you sure about that God, I have known Quentin for 28 years, we have invited him to every gathering, and he had not come. How was he going to contact me?” I knew it would be so, I took God at His word. My first instinct was to rush to Quentin’s side, to go to him uninvited and give him the good knews. “Quenny! God loves you he has given me an understanding, He has allowed me to see your past and God wants me to let you know you are forgiven. This world has lied to you Quenny, and because the God of Creation is a free will God, He will allow what we allow, even when it is not His will.” I was so excited! I had it all planned out. And God said to me loud and clear, “Do you want to do this? Or do you want to do My Will?” I had set out to do what I learned from the world, and God told me to be Christ like, you can go no where with out being invited.

I was to follow God’s plan, be anxious for nothing and pray. Our oldest son was graduating from college and we would invite Quenny to the party. I just knew that was when I could tell Quenny the good news.

He called in his regrets, he was not going to make it to that party. We spoke for awhile on the phone and he asked me how my job was going and I told him I had retired and started a ministry on line and he was speechless. His response was, “I never would have thought that.” I proceeded to tell him, that God and His Son is all I could give the credit to for my success, and I had been lead to tell all that would have It, about the Truth I knew. If they were to choose to know the same, that would be left to them. It was not a competition, for me. I asked Quenny,”Do you have a computer?” He said, “No, I am much to fast for a computer.” I told him if He would like, I could mail him some of the messages that were posted. He said, he would like to see what I had to say. Our conversation ended, and the messages were mailed daily for a month, with no response. No, “I like it.” No, “I don’t like it.” I left it at that.

Had I reached him? I left the Truth with him, would he do the same as me, with his VW, and see for himself. It was him that taught me how to handle the Truth. It was the Holy Spirit that brought it to my rememberance.

Almost a year had gone by, and I asked God in prayer what about Quenny? Did I reach him? God responded, “Invite him to your second son’s graduation, but before you do, write him a letter and in that letter tell him what truth I have told you of him, let him know how much you love him, let him know of the story you remember about his VW. Give him a reason to know your sincere, and he can not deny.

I sent him this letter, I knew touched his soul, because a man so honest can not deny the truth. I let him know that I knew he was tormented by the same spirits as his older brother, who was my father in-law. I also let him know that he was as close as I was going to get to knowing, I could have reached him, and had him say he was proud of me. Months went by and he got the nerve to call and thank me for opening my heart in such a sincere way and that he appreciated all I had done. He touched my soul. I set out to teach him and in doing so, he taught me.

Quenny was sick and it came from years of believing God was not a good God, and you could never ask Him, why? This world and it’s religion had told a honest man a lie. And the pain from the burden he carried, and he thought he had no place he could put it down, because of a lie, could only be eased with alcohol.

God had told me he would come, although he had never been to our house, in 28 years, and he had always been invited to every gathering. It was not because he did not love us, but maybe because he loved us so much and in doing so our burdens became his and he was already overburden. Maybe because he would have to leave the alcohol that eased his pain from such a heavy load.

Quenny, came to our house for my second son’s grauduation from college. He arrived with his two brothers, sister inlaw, niece, and great nephew. He was the guest of honor. Even though it was our son’s graduation, and we love all that came, Quenny was truly a miracle to see. He was sober, and he ate, he was yellow from liver disease, and short of breath from smoking. But I just knew he was at peace with the Truth. The Truth he had wish someone had told him early on, so he could live a life without the load, that a lie places on you.

Quenny, past on to the next life on August 18 2005.

At his funeral I met his co-workers from Safeway and they told me his nick name was the MULE because they could always count on him to shoulder the load if it was to heavy for them. How did I know that.

The last thing Quenny said to me, as we road our electric golf cart over hill and dale at our farm, “Man this thing can really go” to which I responded, “Almost as good as your VW”

If Quenny could tell us anything about God, now that he has seen Him.

He would say; “God allows what we allow”

[Author]

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